RULES FOR GROUP - Subject to change without notice

EMAIL

• FOLLOW ALL DIRECTIONS VERY CAREFULLY.
• ALWAYS send a new email for EACH question;
  Do NOT reply to old or unrelated email threads.
• Do NOT combine emails;
  ONLY ONE SUBJECT per message.
• DO NOT FORWARD ANGER SOLUTION'S EMAILS TO OTHERS.
• Do NOT give out the Group Facilitator's email address or CC anyone to it.
  Use anger.mgmt@protonmail.com instead.
• Typically emails are deleted, for privacy reasons, after viewing them.
  Please do NOT assume Anger Solutions still has them.

HOMEWORK

• You must EMAIL PHOTOS of your completed homework ONCE, EACH WEEK, BEFORE GROUP begins.
• Homework will NOT be "reviewed" after submission.
• Iron out any issues with your homework BEFORE SUBMITTING it, by asking specific questions.
  Put each question in it's own, fresh, email;
  Do NOT revive old or unrelated threads.
  When in doubt: Dial (541)383-2961 and LEAVE A VOICE MESSAGE.
• Each homework submission MUST be in its own, fresh email.
  --Not in a reply to some other thread.
• Only ONE homework attachment is allowed, per week.
  --THAT is your homework submission.
• Homework submissions MUST include the module number in the "Subject" line;
  ONLY homework submissions may reference the module number in the "Subject" line.
  Do NOT place a module number in any other emails -- ONLY in your homework submission.
• All images MUST be upright and legible.
• If you fail to EMAIL YOUR COMPLETED HOMEWORK,
  between the day following the current group and the next session,
  then you won't progress to the next module.
• The previous week's assignment emails are NOT retained.
• If you think you might cut it close making it to group on-time then take your workbook, a pencil, and phone with you so you can still participate.
• Show up, even if you didn't complete your homework, if you want your weekly report to state you were "present" and "in compliance".
• PRINT answers, DO NOT USE CURSIVE, so it's easy to read.
  USE A PENCIL so answers are easy to change, when necessary.
  Do NOT write, draw, or discuss anything you don't want anyone to know.
• ALWAYS SEND ONE COMPLETE HOMEWORK SUBMISSION, per week, in its very own email.
• Additional homework may be assigned at ANY time.
• Most people end up redoing one or more modules.
  Module redoes are not free.

CONNECTION

• Your device is expected to be plugged in, at ALL times.
  If your battery is dying do NOT interrupt the group.
  Handle it on your own. It's NOT our problem.
• If your connection drops, REJOIN MUTED.
  Don't start apologizing when you reconnect.
  --The group will continue without you.

PARTICIPATION

• This is NOT counseling;
  This is NOT therapy;
  The group facilitator is neither a counselor, nor a therapist.
• You're strongly encouraged to use your initials, for your username, in this group.
  At most, please use only your first name and last initial.
• Always be respectful and on-time.
  After 1 minute you're late;
  After 5 minutes you're a no-show.
• EVERYTHING DISCUSSED HERE SHOULD BE TAKEN AS CONFIDENTIAL;
  What's said in group should stay in group.
  Wear headphones if anyone is nearby.
• However, confidentiality can NOT be guaranteed.
  So do NOT admit to any specific crimes.
• You're encouraged to CHIME IN if you have additional ideas about the portion of the module we're covering.
  Consider asking clarifying questions and adding to the answers given by others.
• Any disrespect to this group will REQUIRE AN APOLOGY.
  Absolutely NO THREATS and NO VIOLENCE.
• Do NOT violate ANY restraining orders or no-contact orders, ever, not even as part of an assignment.
• NO arguing; NO excuses; Please ASK to explain.
  Continuing to argue will result in failure to progress.
• When speaking, FOCUS ON YOURSELF, NOT OTHERS.
  YOU ARE THE PERPETRATOR, NOT THE VICTIM.
• Everybody has reasons... When speaking, focus on WHAT YOU DID, NOT WHY you did it.
  If we need to know why then we'll ask.
• Follow the K.I.S.S. principle: "Keep It Short & Simple"
  This means keep your answers as short & simple, as possible.
  --2 to 3 sentences is usually plenty! Let us ask for more information, if we need it.
  Otherwise you'll probably end up exposing more than necessary.
• Giving "reasons" can lead to failure.
  --Unless they are specifically called for (otherwise they're "excuses").

EXCUSES ARE NEVER ALLOWED

MINIMIZING

• "It only happened once ..."
• "I'm not perfect ..."
• "I barely raised my voice ..."
• "I only got a little upset ..."
• "I did better than I usually do ..."

JUSTIFICATION

• "I'd already tried being patient with them ..."
• "I won't put up with that ..."
• "I wasn't in the mood ..."
• "Nobody does that to my family ..."
• "I warned them ..."
• "I would've been late ..."
• "It felt good ..."

BLAMING

• "He took a swing at me ..."
• "They stole from me ..."
• "She started yelling at me ..."
• "I was drunk ..."

Put into practice what you've learned, each week:

• Body -> listen to it! (sensations)
• Gameplan -> have one! (timeout & think)
• Tools -> use them! (relaxation practices)